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AlexR
03/15/2019, 10:19 AM
I've been keeping salt water tanks for over 20 years now and still find myself thinking about how i should feel when a fish dies.

I moved into a new house about 5 years ago and set up a new 125g aquarium.

Ive set up everything to automate as much as possible. I have the RODI setup using a zone valve connected to the tsunami ATO and am using a reef angel controller for all else.

I have basically let my tank cycle for over 4 years. Yes i know that excessive... But i just let it work as a refugium for w long while. The tank has some algae issues at the moment i am dealing with. Am doing bi-weekly water changes now.

I recently started stocking the tank with inhabitants. Got a cleanup crew of over 200 various snails/hermits and a half dozen emerald crabs.

So far i have added several fish which are all doing great except for a blonde naso tang. It was eating well for a week and looked great, but just today i noticed it was not swimming around. Found it hiding in some rock formations and struggling to stay upright. Its still alive but looks like it wont last long.

I understand a 125g is on the small side for a naso tang. The tang is about 2" now and i planned on relocating him to a larger tank when he grew bigger. I wanted him to fatten up on the caulerpai have growing on my rocks.

I put several other fish in at the same time which are all doing well, including a powder brown tang and a flame hawk.

I cant help but to feel bad even though i know its out of my control. I have setup everything the best way i can and do my best to keep all my water parameters at peak levels. It feels like i could always do more.

How yo do feel when a fish dies? I cant be the only one that feel like i'm doing something wrong.. Even after all this time.

sde1500
03/15/2019, 10:32 AM
Hated losing them when I was stocking my tank. Lost a few, and it bugged me. I can't say it made me feel the same as losing my cat or dog would. But it is still a living creature I am trying to care for so it bothered me.

AlexR
03/15/2019, 10:44 AM
Hated losing them when I was stocking my tank. Lost a few, and it bugged me. I can't say it made me feel the same as losing my cat or dog would. But it is still a living creature I am trying to care for so it bothered me.

My acclimation process is basically floating the bags for about 30 minutes for temp to match, draining the bag water as much as possible while still keeping the fish wet and letting them free gracefully without a net. I do this because i have done dripping before and it seems to only stress the fish more and casualty rate has been higher that way for me. I find reducing stress and letting fish free to hide and swim yields better results.


I have had a bengai cardinal, watchman goby and a mandarin alive in my tank for 4 years now. That was all my inhabitants before i decided to stock it.

I am waiting even longer to start putting in any corals. I want all fish to be alive and well for at least 2 months and i want my algae to lessen before i add any corals. I figure a few months for the cleanup crew should be sufficient. I'm also having a hard time calibrating my PH probe. Goes from 7.5 to 8.0, while tests show upwards of 8.4 at the same time. I do have a grounding probe in my refugium and display just to be on the same side. My salinity probe is working fine.

I need to work out all these kinks before i add anything else.

Gah!! i hate it when a fish dies. I feel so guilty. :headwally: :headwally:

RioReefr
03/15/2019, 10:48 AM
How yo do feel when a fish dies? I cant be the only one that feel like i'm doing something wrong.. Even after all this time.

Personally, I treat my fish like pets and I give them names. I want to "try" to make their lives pleasant (considering they have to live a glass-box) by making the water parameters stable and the water clean.

That being said, my favorite fish was a Flame Hawkfish. I liked how his eyes moved independently and he would take frozen shrimp out of my fingertips. As he grew older, he started swimming more at the top and sometimes I would hear splashes (as he was jumping out the water) and I have an open-top. Anyway, one night a (Thursday night), he was splashing more than usual. So I said to myself -- "this Saturday morning I am going to home-store to by some mesh to cover the tank so he doesn't jump out". Sure enough, that next morning I found outside the aquarium and on the floor. My stomach sunk and felt horrible that whole day. I sincerely felt "very sad" but worse it could have been prevented if I would have been more pro-active than reactive.

To cope with the loss, the next day I went to the LFS and purchased a Lawnmower Blenny and he also is amusing to watch though not as "cool" as the Hawkfish.

So, the moral of the story: If you see something wrong, don't wait. Fix it before you regret it. Most home stores are open late and a lot of things can be bought and delivered the next day. If something dies, replace it with something else sooner than later. Emotional distress is real.

sde1500
03/15/2019, 10:49 AM
I lost a fire fish a few months ago now, after close to 3 years in the tank. That bummed me out, but oddly wasn't as bad as losing a new fish. I cared for it, it did well, and I guess just it was its time to go? IDK. But when they are new and I'm trying to acclimate and maybe QT them, it sucks a lot. I am just about stocked, I have maybe one or two fishes I want to add. But so darn hesitant to pull the trigger mainly because things are going so well with the fish already in the tank.

AlexR
03/15/2019, 11:26 AM
I lost a fire fish a few months ago now, after close to 3 years in the tank. That bummed me out, but oddly wasn't as bad as losing a new fish. I cared for it, it did well, and I guess just it was its time to go? IDK. But when they are new and I'm trying to acclimate and maybe QT them, it sucks a lot. I am just about stocked, I have maybe one or two fishes I want to add. But so darn hesitant to pull the trigger mainly because things are going so well with the fish already in the tank.

Similar thing happened to me with a pair of clown fish. I had them for 7 years then all the sudden they both died 1 week apart form each other. It must have just been their time. I had them since they were tiny and they had a pretty long life for a fish. It was sad but not guilty sad.

I feel worse about a fish dying after a week or 2 especially after it was eating well and looked healthy.
As i type this, the blonde naso tang is still tying to hold on.. But i can tell it wont happen.
I would give it a painless death by putting it in a bag and in the freezer but i also want to give him the chance to pull through.

PCguy21
03/15/2019, 12:57 PM
Ive lost thousands in fish... and recently lost a flame hawk from a freak ammonia spike and a mimic tang from ich.copper.

Knew i should hsve not used thst copper tang was fine with ich on him until that.

Lost a fmbunch of other salt fish like fire gobies 6 line wrasses those fish i stay away from they just seem fine one dsy then turn lights off and dead for no reason.

The biggest loss i had were my discus fresh water.. i got discus plague a virus thst is near 100% fstal to discus.. the ones thst do get over it are carriers for life and no amount of quarantine can do snything the fish looks healthy and is he just csrries it.

I lost like 20 discus from it in 6 days.... I almost had a heart attack.... i lost my favorite discus recently to a god damn sucker fish who was sucking on him at night.... i was so upset i almost took that sucker fish and stepped on it... but i gave it away to someone.


Recently though my flame hawk i mentioned... that one really hit me.. i named him rodney dangerfield after the comedian... because it looked like him... and he was awsome best personality ever...

I was saying no no no no no no and panicked when i sqe him limp... i was so heart broken..it happend last night.


Im very close to giving up on salt water.... if i csn somejow keep my kole tang and fixface alive and healthy with ich ill be ok... thr otherfish never get it due ti their slime coats.. flame hawk never got ig either. Snd i like thr corals more almost...

Sigh... it sucks man

alton
03/15/2019, 01:50 PM
My first fish that I got attached too was a small queen angel my wife bought me for our anniversary that grew and grew. Sounds stupid but i froze him in a zip lock bag and placed him on top in our freezer where I see him for about a year before wife made me through it out. Second fish was a copperband that I kept for 13 years before losing it. I still have no reason to buy another copperband. Some people get really attached to their dogs, I add fish to that list.

hkgar
03/15/2019, 02:07 PM
Start by doing TTM for all new fish and at least 2 weeks after that of quarantine. That will help reduce fish death, sure everything ultimately dies but fish can live for several years. You do NOT want to add diseases to your DT.

AlexR
03/15/2019, 03:13 PM
Start by doing TTM for all new fish and at least 2 weeks after that of quarantine. That will help reduce fish death, sure everything ultimately dies but fish can live for several years. You do NOT want to add diseases to your DT.



Ich is in just about any tank, no matter how much you do to prevent it. The parasite is dormant until it finds a host it can attach to. Usually a stressed tang.

Anyway that is not why mine is dying. It most likely simply was not going to make it. In my tank or any other.
Another order I received a week earlier was with a flasher wrasse. The wrasse was almost dead and white in color. 2 days later it got its color back and now a few weeks later has fattened up significantly and has even better color then I could have hoped for. The wrasse is eating just about everything I throw at it.

I understand death is a part of this hobby. It’s still never easy. And no matter how much you try to prevent it - it happens.

lionfish300
03/16/2019, 04:40 PM
Alex, I have heard that Naso Tang is hard to keep even by the most experience. I was lucking to have keep one from juvy this thing came in light tan and white ugly at it can be. Two plus years later it changed to one of the most beautiful fish with streamers and colorful

Bary
03/21/2019, 10:58 PM
When I'm responsible for caretaking a living creature and it dies I take it seriously and feel pretty bad about it.

Dmorty217
03/22/2019, 08:53 AM
I'm not one for naming fish but it bothers me when I lose a fish. You put a lot of time,effort and money into this hobby and its heartbreaking to see it all come crashing down in a fraction of the time that you had invested.

AlexR
03/22/2019, 08:54 AM
I'm not one for naming fish but it bothers me when I lose a fish. You put a lot of time,effort and money into this hobby and its heartbreaking to see it all come crashing down in a fraction of the time that you had invested.



My kids name all the fish.
I let them know to wait at least 2-3 weeks before naming them.
Never know.

AlexR
03/22/2019, 08:55 AM
I must say tho. For all the deaths can can occur, the feeling of having a healthy and happy looking fish is all worth the aggravation and sadness of deaths.

dkeller_nc
03/22/2019, 10:11 AM
Ich is in just about any tank, no matter how much you do to prevent it. The parasite is dormant until it finds a host it can attach to. Usually a stressed tang.


That's false, but unfortunately a really common misperception in the hobby. And sadly, consolidation in the wholesaler side of the saltwater fish hobby means that there's a lot more disease to deal with than there was 15 years ago.

AlexR
03/22/2019, 10:16 AM
That's false, but unfortunately a really common misperception in the hobby. And sadly, consolidation in the wholesaler side of the saltwater fish hobby means that there's a lot more disease to deal with than there was 15 years ago.



Well whatever the case may be, thank goodness I’ve never had to deal with ich.
My power brown tang looks amazing and is eating everything I throw at it.

Hope it stays that way.

SereneAquatic
03/22/2019, 10:42 AM
Our second fish purchase ever was a flame angel. I fell in love with it, but it refused to eat much. We watched it slowly starve over the course of about 6 weeks while doing everything we could to help it. By the time it died, I was a wreck. I still can't bring myself to buy another one, but maybe some day.

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk

PCguy21
03/23/2019, 02:43 AM
flame angels went up in price, so did a few other fish i noticed.. they were 60 in petco now 65$.. I had one for like 4 months then i went on vacation and my friend killed it somehow.. im not sure how exactly.. i just havent got myself to buy another one, i probably will if i make my move to my 135g tank.

hkgar
03/24/2019, 01:41 PM
That's false, but unfortunately a really common misperception in the hobby. And sadly, consolidation in the wholesaler side of the saltwater fish hobby means that there's a lot more disease to deal with than there was 15 years ago.

Just how does consolidation mean more disease?

AlexR
04/23/2019, 08:15 AM
My bengai cardinal was found dead today.
Had that fish for going on 5 years.

Uncle99
04/23/2019, 08:56 AM
That's false, but unfortunately a really common misperception in the hobby. And sadly, consolidation in the wholesaler side of the saltwater fish hobby means that there's a lot more disease to deal with than there was 15 years ago.

Good for you!
100% correct.
It may be the most common....

laverda
04/23/2019, 07:10 PM
My bengai cardinal was found dead today.
Had that fish for going on 5 years.

That is the problem with not quarantining new arrivals. One fish brings in something and now fish you have had for years are dying. Which fish will be next? No fish go into my display without spending 90 days in my qt first. It really is just a small 50gallon reef tank so I can make sure they are healty first. Much better to lose there than risk the 23 fish in my main tank. I have 1 clown that is over 25 years in my care. Her mate is 2 years younger. My sailfin tang I have had for 24 years. My yellow tang is older although I have had it only 23 years myself. Previous owner said it was 4 years old when I got it naking it 27 years old.

AlexR
04/23/2019, 07:13 PM
That is the problem with not quarantining new arrivals. One fish brings in something and now fish you have had for years are dying. Which fish will be next? No fish go into my display without spending 90 days in my qt first. It really is just a small 50gallon reef tank so I can make sure they are healty first. Much better to lose there than risk the 23 fish in my main tank. I have 1 clown that is over 25 years in my care. Her mate is 2 years younger. My sailfin tang I have had for 24 years. My yellow tang is older although I have had it only 23 years myself. Previous owner said it was 4 years old when I got it naking it 27 years old.



This has nothing to do with quarantining or not. Although it can for other situations.
I rarely add new fish. Very rarely.

I just looked up the lifespan of the bengai cardinal. Mine was about 5 years in my tank and who knows how old when I got him.
Their lifespan in the wild is about 2 years. In captivity they can live longer but up to around 4 years. So I feel good about giving this fish a nice long life.

bosshog
04/23/2019, 08:22 PM
If you’ve got livestock you’ll have dead stock, that’s what my grandfather told me decades ago. Cows, pigs, chickens, fish, feel bad and carry on. Death is a fact of life.

swhobbie1
04/23/2019, 08:40 PM
I have learned a lot over the years with this hobby but recently learned that like designing technology solutions it is a very good idea to build redundancies in our reefs. I did a WC. Before going to bed I was thinking how beautiful the tank looked that night. Next morning I get up, then realize one by one every fish in my tank is dead. I had them for 3 to 15 years , all dead. I’m not sure what caused it - either a contaminant in the boxed ocean water I used or perhaps the PH was very high leading to ammonia or something. I realized my Apex looked like it was working but was not doing any alerts- no audible, no email, no txt so no warning of a problem. I promptly bought a seneye monitor which duplicates some of what my apex does but also alerts for ammonia. Had tanks for decades and never had this problem. Never want to wake up to that sight again. I put a $5k generator on my house for that 15 year old clownfish I started back into the hobby with. Never like to see a fish die but some are more special than others.

laverda
04/24/2019, 12:19 AM
This has nothing to do with quarantining or not. Although it can for other situations.
I rarely add new fish. Very rarely.

I just looked up the lifespan of the bengai cardinal. Mine was about 5 years in my tank and who knows how old when I got him.
Their lifespan in the wild is about 2 years. In captivity they can live longer but up to around 4 years. So I feel good about giving this fish a nice long life.

I don't know where you are getting your information but I have a Bengai Cardinal that is 11 years old and still very healthy. I have 4 fish 22-27 years old currently. When fish die of old age you can see it coming they start looking like an old fish. They slow down, lose weight, their colors fade and their fins become tattered. It does not happen overnight, if you are paying attenion to their condition. I have a wrasse that is going through it now. It looks like an old fish! It still eats and I make sure it gets extra food, but I know it will not be around in a month or two and I will be sad.

AlexR
04/24/2019, 05:52 AM
I don't know where you are getting your information but I have a Bengai Cardinal that is 11 years old and still very healthy. I have 4 fish 22-27 years old currently. When fish die of old age you can see it coming they start looking like an old fish. They slow down, lose weight, their colors fade and their fins become tattered. It does not happen overnight, if you are paying attenion to their condition. I have a wrasse that is going through it now. It looks like an old fish! It still eats and I make sure it gets extra food, but I know it will not be around in a month or two and I will be sad.



I use google

MondoBongo
04/24/2019, 07:29 AM
I use google

i would be skeptical of that information.

honestly, i think many of the estimates we see for fish longevity are based on poor husbandry, or not knowing how old the fish you got was.

i know some clownfish and tangs old enough to graduate from college, and even allegedly fragile fish like Orange Spotted Filefish (Oxymonacanthus longirostris) should live at least 4 or 5 years in captivity.

AlexR
04/24/2019, 08:29 AM
Unlike many other species of marine fish, the Banggai cardinalfish lacks a planktonic stage in its life history. The species has a short lifespan, reaching around 4 years in optimal conditions in captivity, and perhaps 1 to 2 years in the wild.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banggai_cardinalfish#Ecology

MondoBongo
04/24/2019, 08:36 AM
Unlike many other species of marine fish, the Banggai cardinalfish lacks a planktonic stage in its life history. The species has a short lifespan, reaching around 4 years in optimal conditions in captivity, and perhaps 1 to 2 years in the wild.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banggai_cardinalfish#Ecology

yeah, i read the link. the information is not exactly hard to find.

but i'm still highly skeptical of it. in fact, i've never seen any information on how those longevity statistics were collected. were they actual studies? if so, what were their controls? how did they identify and track individuals? how did they account for their variables?

i tend to think most of those estimates are about 15 - 20% lower than they should be.

-edit- i tried to hit their citation link, but it 404s.

AlexR
04/24/2019, 08:40 AM
yeah, i read the link. the information is not exactly hard to find.

but i'm still highly skeptical of it. in fact, i've never seen any information on how those longevity statistics were collected. were they actual studies? if so, what were their controls? how did they identify and track individuals? how did they account for their variables?

i tend to think most of those estimates are about 15 - 20% lower than they should be.

-edit- i tried to hit their citation link, but it 404s.



While I tend to agree with you.
This makes me feel better about the fish’s death so I’ll go with it.

My live stock was added a couple months ago.
The cardinal was acting sluggish for a little while, about a week or so.
At times is looked weak. But was still eating good.
Then i found it jammed inside a crevice like it got stuck there, where it was dead.

d0ughb0y
04/24/2019, 09:59 AM
Last time I had fish die, my kids were still small, and they will sing the wizard of oz munchkin coroner song before we flush the fish down the toilet.

laverda
04/25/2019, 11:15 AM
Unlike many other species of marine fish, the Banggai cardinalfish lacks a planktonic stage in its life history. The species has a short lifespan, reaching around 4 years in optimal conditions in captivity, and perhaps 1 to 2 years in the wild.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banggai_cardinalfish#Ecology
Clearly that info is wrong as both mine are much older with my female being 11 years in my care and still looking good. She eas fully grown when I got her so probably 12 years old. My best guess is my name is at least 7 years old. I know other people yhat have had them 6+7 years as well.

reret10
04/26/2019, 11:44 PM
I once won a goldfish at the school carnival in 1st grade. Being a kid, I kept him in a big bowl with a bunch of plants. I had that fish for 13 years and it died 2 days after I graduated high school. I'm not too emotional of a person but I think I cried more that day than any other time in my life. Something about marking the end of my childhood and such.

I also have a Bangaii Cardinal that's at least 6 years old so they have to live a bit longer than that!

VIVVIV
04/30/2019, 07:11 PM
This might be a bit off topic, but I was wondering if anyone found it very odd and sad at the same time that we engage in a conversation about Fish Grieving, but no one talks about the children all over the world dying because they don't have food, medicine, shelter. Etc. Maybe my visits to Ukrainian Orphananges, while being valiantly run for almost nothing have changed my view.

But let's get back to earth. Do you propose to shed a tear for a fish you bought causing it to be recklessly plucked from the ocean to be sold you and others. You SHOULD have cried the day you bought it, because that is effectively when you sentanced it to death.

But I am still in the hobby in a new way.
1-Man made rock or substitute (anything except actual harvested live rock)
2-Captive bread fish only.
3-Only commercially grown corals and frags. Frag and share as many as you can to keep the DNA cooking.

I feel much better doing it this way.

AlexR
04/30/2019, 07:15 PM
A bit off topic? You think?!?

I suggest going on a political forum and let your liberalism fly. I’m not here for that.

When a pet is in my possession I am responsible for it. I am not responsible for the worlds problems or yours.

AlexR
04/30/2019, 07:24 PM
Some people (like me) enjoy this hobby to get their minds off of other things. That’s what hobbies tend to be for for some people.
Usually responsible adults who already have a ton on their plate to deal with.

Throwing guilt trips around saying a pet your responsible for should not be thought about because children are dying and people are starving is ridiculous imo.

Just saying. Your post is totally uncalled for and is just plain wrong in a hobbyist forum for salt water aquarium hobbyists.

hkgar
05/08/2019, 02:10 PM
some people (like me) enjoy this hobby to get their minds off of other things. That’s what hobbies tend to be for for some people.
Usually responsible adults who already have a ton on their plate to deal with.

Throwing guilt trips around saying a pet your responsible for should not be thought about because children are dying and people are starving is ridiculous imo.

Just saying. Your post is totally uncalled for and is just plain wrong in a hobbyist forum for salt water aquarium hobbyists.

+1

j.falk
05/09/2019, 01:27 PM
http://static1.squarespace.com/static/55e97d2de4b0a47f46957437/576618e8e4fcb52666c31369/59140966c534a5e3456c4a62/1494823353818/iStock-176710520.jpg?format=1500w

I tend to not get attached to the fish I keep. I also no longer name them (which my wife thinks is weird since they are our pets).

I think it's because I worked at a local fish store for 14 years of my life and I saw lots of fish die during my time there. Cleaning out the dead fish from the tanks every morning before the store opened was just another part of the job so I guess it sort of numbed me to fish deaths as it was a daily occurrence.

AlexR
05/09/2019, 01:45 PM
http://static1.squarespace.com/static/55e97d2de4b0a47f46957437/576618e8e4fcb52666c31369/59140966c534a5e3456c4a62/1494823353818/iStock-176710520.jpg?format=1500w

I tend to not get attached to the fish I keep. I also no longer name them (which my wife thinks is weird since they are our pets).

I think it's because I worked at a local fish store for 14 years of my life and I saw lots of fish die during my time there. Cleaning out the dead fish from the tanks every morning before the store opened was just another part of the job so I guess it sort of numbed me to fish deaths as it was a daily occurrence.



I can understand this.
I always figure each fish you own and if it’s alive for long enough you get used to it individual characteristics.
Each fish species is similar in a way but when it’s yours in your own environment they tend to become more familiar and thus the attachment happens.
That’s just me tho.

Fish559
05/09/2019, 03:44 PM
I try to learn from it if it's something I did wrong. I tell myself that these are delicate creates that I knowingly took from their natural habitat, and that I do the best I can to keep them healthy.

And if I'm being honest, I immediately think about a fish to replace it. Sorry, but I do.

Fish559
05/09/2019, 03:45 PM
This might be a bit off topic, but I was wondering if anyone found it very odd and sad at the same time that we engage in a conversation about Fish Grieving, but no one talks about the children all over the world dying because they don't have food, medicine, shelter. Etc.

What the heck?

AlexR
05/09/2019, 03:47 PM
I try to learn from it if it's something I did wrong. I tell myself that these are delicate creates that I knowingly took from their natural habitat, and that I do the best I can to keep them healthy.

And if I'm being honest, I immediately think about a fish to replace it. Sorry, but I do.



It takes me a while. It’s rare I add fish.
I added fish a couple months ago and before that it was about 5 years ago.
From the new fish I added I had one death.
I do plan on adding a few more eventually. Maybe another couple months from now.

AlexR
05/09/2019, 03:50 PM
What the heck?



The person who posted that must have some serious issues...
You can post that in just about any forum for any topic and it’s a valid argument — but has absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand.
Just strange to bring up such things here.

KafudaFish
05/11/2019, 06:01 AM
Floater = red solo cup
Bobber = net
Wedge = chopsticks

AlexR
05/11/2019, 10:12 AM
Floater = red solo cup
Bobber = net
Wedge = chopsticks



For me it’s rare. I am not that accustomed to a fish death in my tank.

WVfishguy
05/12/2019, 10:30 PM
I had a aquarium maintenance business for the past 25 plus years. I was always amazed how my customers took it for granted their fish would never die.

Salt water fish would live from the time my customer's children were born until they went into high school, some freshwater fish lived even longer (certain cichlids, & clown loaches are nearly immortal). And when the damn things would finally kick the bucket they would complain.

I had a customer with a beautiful planted barb tank (freshwater) complain one of his many tiger barbs died, to which I replied, "Thank God! You've had those things nearly six years! They have a life span of two years. It was creeping me out!"

Some other customers had fish die, and I told them, "Sorry your fish finally died, but it was about time - I've never had a cat or dog live for 20 years."

cody6766
05/14/2019, 09:42 PM
I see my reef fish as a hybrid between a decoration and a pet. They're living critters which I assume enter my tank as healthy animals (probably not always true, but it'll make sense in a second). I don't really fell sad if a fish dies, but do feel like I failed at my responsibilities. If I take on a life (fish, coral, snail or plant), I feel that I should give it my best to keep it alive. That means conditions, equipment, water quality, etc. I owe it to the life in my glass box to do my best to make it thrive.
A the end of the day, I look at a dead fish/coral/etc and ask, "what could I have done?" If the answer is nothing, I send it down the toilet and don't bat an eye. If I somehow neglected its care, I take that as a lesson learned, feel a little bad for killing something in my care and do better next time. "Better" may mean not buying it again or changing my reef. Life is important and I feel a little worse losing a long-term fish than a week old fish, but no fish has ever seemed like a "real" pet like my parrots or a dog.

gargoylenest
05/15/2019, 12:39 AM
when one of my fishes dies, i see it as a failure on my part to care for an animal that was living happily in the sea before it was kidnapped and put in cage for my pleasure. I keep my wall of shame in my aquarium room with picture of every fishes I failed. Motivate me to do better.

Sounds Fishy
05/15/2019, 04:05 AM
My first saltwater fish died back in 1971.I felt horrible because I was so stupid or naive.I added a lionfish to my first ever saltwater aquarium and it ate a really nice baby tomato clown right in front of me.Since then I've lost fish but I try to be a lot more carefull.Most of my fish live well over 5 years now.My feeling towards keeping any pets has always been try do your best to do in order what it takes to keep them well and happy.I still feel terrible when a fish dies.

travis32
05/15/2019, 07:01 AM
Well, I had something simple go wrong, My 350 gallon display was doing great, new tank syndrome - lots of cyano, but, I had spent 3 months adding 19 fish. They were all thriving until one day. my most recent additions - anthias, started dieing. 2 in one day were just missing. I was irritated, but, I know anthias can be delicate. I increased my feeding regime, and did the best I could to give them a nice home. a couple days later 2 more were dead. No signs of anything wrong with those still alive. Nothing at all. Those still alive were eating and swimming healthily. Then 3 disappeared.
Then it wasn't just the anthias, I lost my cardinals I had had since the beginning, they were the first fish. My clown fish died, and I knew I had a real problem. It was spiraling out of control. However, it was too late, 14 fish out of 19 fish died. I felt extremely horrible. This had to be my fault somehow. Was it disease? Could I have treated? Was it something else. I worked with my LFS. I was so confused because if it was water contamination my corals should be dieing... they weren't. They were growing... Faster than I've ever seen any corals grow. So, it wasn't the water in my opinion.

Then, I checked electrical, touched something grounded and put my hand in the sump, my hand vibrated from the continuous shock going through it... I turned my heaters off, it stopped... I had a bad heater, electrifying the entire tank. Hard to say when it went bad or what, but, must have been around the time I added the Anthias. Some fish had marks on them, my rabbit fish, which is still alive, had obvious signs of flukes or a parasite. Just a couple sticking out the side of him. I felt horrible and angry!

I replaced both of my heaters as a result and haven't added any fish since then. I'm going to let the remaining 5 heal from their electroshock therapy and feed well, and make sure everyone is happy before adding anymore fish. The tank looks void of life right now a 350 gallon display with 5 fish. and maybe 20 corals.....

AlexR
05/15/2019, 02:07 PM
Wow it’s very interesting how people deal with deaths in this hobby.
Needless to say, everyone is different. But so many have similar feelings that I do.

No it’s not like a dog or cat. For me I suppose it more like a rabbit. I just had a rabbit die after having it for a dozen years. It was buried and no tears shed (Except by my daughter).

It’s a feeling of failure. Did I do anything wrong? What could I have done better? Did I shorten its lifespan? Am I contributing to a demise of a species? All those things go through my head...