McBeck
03/01/2005, 08:02 PM
I am SUCH a baby!!
The Tub is in the basement, so I started to mosey on down there last night. I got to the bend in the stairs, which is 8 steps away from the basement floor. From this distance, I see the BIGGEST black spider I have ever seen in the state of Missouri sitting in front of the wall opposite the stair landing!!!
Naturally, I froze. I couldn't go down, and I couldn't turn my back. This thing was big enough to push start a VW! I finally focused my adrenaline and bolted to the garage to arm myself.
I returned to the bend in the stairs and found my opponent, who obviously thought he was the victor of the stare down, attempting to leave the scene.
I took aim with my trusty can of Real Kill Wasp & Hornet (& spider) destroyer, and fired a direct blast right onto him. It flipped him onto his back - YES! I took advantage of his defenseless state and unloaded two more shots.
Then I paused to catch my breath and congratulate myself on my long-range shooting. No sooner had I relaxed my grip on the can then the d^mn thing flipped back over and started trying to escape.
It took 3 direct hits of Real Kill and it was up and running! Clearly this is a strain of super-spider that has beefed himself up by basking in the light of my halides.
I took aim once again and unloaded at least 1/3 of the can on him. Again he was flipped onto his back, and again he righted himself. There he was, struggling in a puddle of poison, yet he was ready to make a run for it.
Exasperated and outmatched, I finally called for backup. "Bill... Bill... bill bill bill BILL BILL!! QUICK!! BRING SOMETHING BIG AND SMASHY!!!"
The spousal unit arrived toting a scrap of 2x4. With extreme and admirable bravery, he descended the stairs to engage the beast in hand-to-hand combat.
It took 3 powerful blows with the 2x4 before it stopped moving. I swear to god this was the toughest g'dam spider I have ever seen. I am STILL freaking out, mostly because:
1. What in the heck was that thing eating?!?!
2. You know there is never just one...
I haven't even opened the basement door today. I'm writing this in an effort to gather my courage to face the basement, but I'm not sure if I can do it today. The spousal unit may be on tub feeding duty for a few days...
In case you can't tell, I am a true arachnaphobiac. If Bill ever refused to be the spider slayer, I'd probably have to move to one of the poles (no spiders there!!) :LOL:
The Tub is in the basement, so I started to mosey on down there last night. I got to the bend in the stairs, which is 8 steps away from the basement floor. From this distance, I see the BIGGEST black spider I have ever seen in the state of Missouri sitting in front of the wall opposite the stair landing!!!
Naturally, I froze. I couldn't go down, and I couldn't turn my back. This thing was big enough to push start a VW! I finally focused my adrenaline and bolted to the garage to arm myself.
I returned to the bend in the stairs and found my opponent, who obviously thought he was the victor of the stare down, attempting to leave the scene.
I took aim with my trusty can of Real Kill Wasp & Hornet (& spider) destroyer, and fired a direct blast right onto him. It flipped him onto his back - YES! I took advantage of his defenseless state and unloaded two more shots.
Then I paused to catch my breath and congratulate myself on my long-range shooting. No sooner had I relaxed my grip on the can then the d^mn thing flipped back over and started trying to escape.
It took 3 direct hits of Real Kill and it was up and running! Clearly this is a strain of super-spider that has beefed himself up by basking in the light of my halides.
I took aim once again and unloaded at least 1/3 of the can on him. Again he was flipped onto his back, and again he righted himself. There he was, struggling in a puddle of poison, yet he was ready to make a run for it.
Exasperated and outmatched, I finally called for backup. "Bill... Bill... bill bill bill BILL BILL!! QUICK!! BRING SOMETHING BIG AND SMASHY!!!"
The spousal unit arrived toting a scrap of 2x4. With extreme and admirable bravery, he descended the stairs to engage the beast in hand-to-hand combat.
It took 3 powerful blows with the 2x4 before it stopped moving. I swear to god this was the toughest g'dam spider I have ever seen. I am STILL freaking out, mostly because:
1. What in the heck was that thing eating?!?!
2. You know there is never just one...
I haven't even opened the basement door today. I'm writing this in an effort to gather my courage to face the basement, but I'm not sure if I can do it today. The spousal unit may be on tub feeding duty for a few days...
In case you can't tell, I am a true arachnaphobiac. If Bill ever refused to be the spider slayer, I'd probably have to move to one of the poles (no spiders there!!) :LOL: