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random observations, thoughts on life, humorous stories....from the studio while I paint.
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The Naughty List

Posted 10/06/2010 at 10:32 PM by superkat
Updated 10/06/2010 at 10:44 PM by superkat

Ok...i'm in a fantastic mood tonight...and I want to take advantage of that. I've been posting a lot of deep, insightful things lately...some on the depressing side...but frankly...life isn't always sunny now, is it? Today, however...prompted by a conversation with a good friend...one i thought maybe i had lost...i was almost late picking my son up from school....and THAT...is not something you want to do at his school.

A few weeks ago, after a night of little sleep, Liam and I were late waking up. A few two many "snooze taps" on the phone. While I'm processing early morning thought and movement coordination, my first priority was to make sure Liam had a good breakfast. Cereal, is fast...banana...good...perfect...and if he's a little late, that's okay, because I made sure he didn't go hungry. Right?

WRONG.

He was two minutes late. When I went to pick him up that afternoon, he said, "teacher put your name on the naughty list, Mom."

What the??????

I asked Liam about it and he said that there is a book with bright orange paper and an orange binder that has the names of all the parents of all the kids who arrive late or get picked up late at school.

I reiterate......

WHAT THE?????

I saw his teacher and apologized for having Liam late to school and asked about the book. It, indeed, exists. And my name is in it. I'm on the teacher's schnitzle list already. Awesome.

I had another opportunity to get my name in this book last week. I succeeded. Wednesdays are early dismissal. Okay, I'm new to this. I haven't had a child in school in a long time. In fact, the last time I actually was responsible for driving my child to school, a "cell phone" came in a small suitcase with a battery you cranked to charge. The kind the army used to have. I kid you not. So, coupled with the fact that I am actually waking up to an alarm clock again after 18 odd years is hard enough, remembering all the small nuances of drop off/pick up times is even harder. I forgot about the early dismissal. I was late picking him up.

NOT GOOD.

Before my child was "released" to me, i was instructed by the "responsible adult" that i had to sign my name in the orange book. Oh Good God. Liam was right...it is....BRIGHT BRIGHT ORANGE....with neon orange paper inside. I had to put my sunglasses back on in order to keep it from blinding me. And there on the first page of this book is my name...right up there at the top...the top 3 to be exact.....LATE ARRIVAL. And now...I was about to etch, yet again, my name in this book. I inspected a few pages...and yes...my name would be the first double entry. I swear, as i shielded my eyes from the glare and signed my name, I thought I heard a voice from the heavens say, "that's gonna cost ya."

But wait! There's more. Next to your name there is a place under the heading: REASON. I'm a proud woman...I really don't want to write "I forgot." Not to mention...there really wasn't enough space to write much more and I certainly didn't want child protection services on my doorstep asking me how I could possibly forget my own child, not knowing that it was only the early dismissal I forgot about. So I decided to leave that blank.

Okay. Big sigh. Get my boy and go. I'm halfway out the door and I hear from behind me, "Eh hem. You forgot to fill in the reason."

I'm sorry I keep repeating myself, but....WHAT THE??????

I turned around, Liam says, "Mommy, you have to put a reason. Like why you are late." I'm now doing some creative thinking. I walk up to the flaming orange book of death and pause....Liam is now standing beside me pointing to the teeny blank space next to my name which is now in the book twice. "Right there, Mom. Put why." So I look at him...my five year old...and whisper, "are they gonna be mad if I write "i forgot"?" He pulls me closer to him and whispers back, "is that why?" And I nod. He whispers again, "i don't know. just write it." The "responsible adult" is now staring at us..and another teacher...and I now can see another parent waiting to make an entry in the book as well...looking perplexed. So I quickly wrote in, "frgt erly disms" It was all I could fit in and still get my point across.

Got my son...leaving...the next parent up to the book calls to me, "Hey, um, Kathleen? did you forget about the early dismissal, too?" I don't answer....she says, "i'm just going to write what she did, but it's all abbreviated. That's okay, right, that it's abbreviated?" I'm starting now to tip toe out of the school. The other mom, child in tow...comes up next to me and says, "Hey!!! Welcome!! You got your name on the Naughty List!" And goes skipping out the door.

I'm horrified. I'm on a PARENT NAUGHTY LIST?????? TWICE??????

Since this episode...I have changed all the clocks in the house, the car, and my cell phone. I am on "Parent Naughty List" time now. It's fifteen minutes earlier than the rest of you.

Joy.

Peace my friends,
Kat
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Comments

  1. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    TOOOO FUNNNNNYYYY! At our school ( at least middle and high) they don't do anything if the parent is late. Once a month we have charter day, so all the students get out at 12:30... well... my car pool forgot to wait for me. I ended up sitting there till 5:00. There, the only kid around, just sitting in the middle of the parking lot. A few seconds later I see my moms car racing into the parking lot at what was probably 15 times the speed limit. You could tell me to get a cell phone, so I could call some one; I do have one. The problem is my mom doesn't keep her cell phone on, and my dads job makes him turn his off during work hours. Yup, let's just say I found new meaning in watching clouds.
    Posted 10/07/2010 at 10:36 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  2. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    Superkat died again!
    Posted 10/12/2010 at 03:40 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  3. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    We have a large open space by our house. I have a target out there that I shoot paint balls at. For about two months I've been going out there and doing target practice. My dad has even come with me. Normally no one bothers me about it, and since the paint balls are bio degradable I thought nothing was wrong. Today as I was walking home a lady took a picture of me. It scared the hell out of me. No one really owns the field, and I wasn't causing damage to any thing, so how is that wrong. Plus I my parents said it was fine to do so. Do you think I should be worried?
    Posted 10/12/2010 at 06:55 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  4. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    depends on who the land belongs to. to put your mind at ease, i would ask your Dad to go with you to her house, if you know where she is, and ask her. I think the worst that could happen is someone maybe from the county pays you a visit and asks you not to do it anymore.

    On the bright side...maybe she just thought you were a good subject for a photo????? probably not...and yes, if it were me, i'd be a little spooked that some random lady was snapping a picture of me.

    let me know what happens.

    and no, i'm not dead....obviously.
    Posted 10/13/2010 at 04:02 AM by superkat superkat is offline
  5. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    LOL, you haven't posted in a while. The land belongs to our neighborhood, or at least the home owners association. The area has some trails through it, but thats about it. I didn't want to hit any houses, or leave paint by the trails, so I put the target at the base of a large hill. No one can really see where the target is, so she must have followed me. I don't mind stopping if it bothers her, but she should ask me to stop before taking a picture of me. I'm glad it happened now because my friend and I were planning to have paint ball match this week end.
    Posted 10/13/2010 at 07:11 AM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  6. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    i love paintball. is that bad for an adult???
    Posted 10/13/2010 at 08:29 PM by superkat superkat is offline
  7. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    i'd have the match anyway. lol.
    Posted 10/13/2010 at 08:30 PM by superkat superkat is offline
  8. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    I know a few adults that paint ball. I've never been in a match though. Have a Tippman A5 with 14in barrel, e-trigger, 4 pods, 2 co2 tanks, and an fps meter. I bought it all off craigs list for $100.
    Posted 10/13/2010 at 11:08 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  9. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    gotta love craigslist. i don't own equipment, don't even know what anything is, but once a year I go down to the woods around Naples at a friend's cabin and spend a weekend shooting people with paint. It's very liberating. lol.
    Posted 10/18/2010 at 08:58 PM by superkat superkat is offline
  10. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    I want to buy a paint ball mine. They are beast! You can buy small PMNs that just take out one person, or you can buy claymores that spray paint in a 15 foot radius. There's also paint ball grenades. I personally don't like the grenades, but they are kind of fun. I like my paint ball gun because it can shoot in three modes, 1 shot, 3 shot, and 30 balls a second full auto.
    Posted 10/18/2010 at 10:25 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  11. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    I really want to go in a game, but I have yet to set up an official date with my friend.
    Posted 10/18/2010 at 10:25 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  12. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    i seriously LOVE the weekend of paintball in the woods.
    Posted 10/19/2010 at 10:47 AM by superkat superkat is offline
  13. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    Are you a sniper, gorilla, or head on charge kind of player.
    Posted 10/19/2010 at 03:35 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
  14. New Comment
    superkat's Avatar
    hmm...not sure...i sneak around trees, hide behind stuff...kinda sneak up on people...or find a great spot and just wait. But if I see an open opportunity...i'll charge right in. so is that a little of everything????
    Posted 10/20/2010 at 10:09 PM by superkat superkat is offline
  15. New Comment
    Mmckibben's Avatar
    I'm a sniper. =}
    Posted 10/20/2010 at 10:10 PM by Mmckibben Mmckibben is offline
 

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